Another school year has started - that is what prompted the photo shoot below - I have a hard time forking out $80 for school portraits when I have a sister-in-law, Kim, who can take pictures like these.
Damien is now in 6th grade - and starting band again - he plays the drum. Garret has started 4th grade and is looking forward to learning lots of facts to come home and quiz Mom and Dad about. Serena has skipped a year and is now in 3rd grade. She will be pulled out of the classroom for extra help to get her caught up, as she has had so much to learn since coming over from Ethiopia not even speaking English 2 1/2 yrs. ago. Kira is in 2nd grade and is finding it hard to be responsible! They all love their teachers and get along good, (as far as I know) with their classmates.
Gabe is also growing up and is easier to handle, giving me a break from the constant neediness of toddlerhood. He is actually helpful with the babies (I babysit in the morning), running errands around the house, etc. He lets me know whenever there is a problem around the house - and it pays to go check out whatever he reports, because it's generally true!
Zeke is 7 months now and is a pile of fun. Stu loves to get him laughing and it melts his daddy's heart when he says, "da da da..." Stu claims that other than me, he loves Zeke more than he's loved another person. I laugh and tell him he's said that for every one of our babies. Maybe there's a connection between the need to protect and love - they both fill up your heart and mind in a way... I don't know, but he sure has his dad wrapped around his little finger. Zeke just popped out his first tooth - he's been working on it for ages it seems. I brought him to the doctor last week for the first time in his life (he was born at home, and had the midwife care for the first months.) because he had a fever of 102. The doctor said the fever was from his teething. Okay - I remember my other kids running temperatures when they were teething, but I didn't think it was that alarming! But sure enough, his tooth was out a day or so later, and the runny nose he also had, is cleared up. Someone was commenting about how I should know all about the "ins and outs" of babyhood, because of how many kids I have. I just laughed. I probably should know all there is to know, but I don't. It's amazing to me how many of the little details that you forget, and too, it's amazing how different each kid can be. Stu is often commenting on how I should write more things down in the kid's baby books, because otherwise we'll never remember the cute things they say, etc. Gabe just came off with a "term" that was new to me. Zeke had just woken up and was hungry, and since I nurse him, I was settling down to feed him. Gabe said, "no, not the belly - feed him the bowl!" Zeke eats his baby food out of a bowl now, and Gabe just thinks that's the greatest - especially now that Zeke is taking over Gabe's highchair, which gives him the reason to graduate to a bar stool like the rest of us. "not the belly!" (ahh the innocence!)
I didn't think about how much Gabe is getting into trouble, until he started apologizing for everything. He gets a new toy, and I say, "Gabe, what do you say to Grandma for the new toy?" He sobers his face and says, "Sorry".
Ahhh! Poor kid - he must feel like he better cover his tracks whether he understands why, or not - "sorry" should get mom off my case!
Another cute thing he's been doing right now, is trying to coax his mom into giving him what he wants by acting like it's not really a big deal. If I give him something healthy to eat, he'll say in a resigning voice, "I guess I'll just have a cupcake." Or if I get him a cup of water, he scrunches up his face and says, "I guess I'll just have juice." as if juice is a step down from water. Poor kid, he'll have to learn that if I feel manipulated, cuteness doesn't work - water he's getting.
I love his childish speech. He uses "yesterday" in a way that shows he clearly doesn't understand what it means. When it's time for bed, I remind him to go to the bathroom first. He says, "I dust did, yesterday!"
It's so fun to watch our babies grow up.
As far as our "bigger" kids, that's interesting too - though you take a lot for granted, since the growth doesn't seem to come as quickly.
Kira is getting taller and less little girly - though "little girly" she is! She could spend hours in her room playing with stuffed animals or hard little animals - or she sits outside playing with the animals in the landscape. Or, she is in one of our window-wells, catching frogs. Most of the time, she is a ragamuffin - I can't seem to get her hair to stay tidy for more than a moment. She is a "velcro" girl, and is over-the-top "lovey" to Grandma or Auntie Cheri, Jodi or Kim. You can see part of her personality in the photos below. Amazing that a butterfly came along during the photoshoot - that was Kira's dream to have her picture taken with one. Her favorite song is "Butterfly Kisses." Last year she brought a CD with that song to school and danced with it for a little talent show they had. She said the teacher cried.
Garret is the brains in the family. Brain as in "facts". I differentiate because he also tends to be an "air head". (don't tell him I said that.) If he is reading something, and you talk to him, he doesn't hear. Or if you told him to do something he says, "okay", and goes off and does something you didn't even ask him to do. This has happened over and over. He is the deepest thinker in our family - he's always in another world. Even while he is eating, he absentmindedly shoves his food in his mouth, spilling crumbs all over the floor (he is NINE for goodness sake.)
In the main, he doesn't get into trouble, except for the occasional explosive sibling rivalry - which I might add, if pushed too far, Garret has a temper! I mean the bawling, face screwed up kind. One time, there was a straw that broke the camel's back for me, and I lost it, and cried and acted like I was going to pull out my hair. Garret looks on, and says, "I know how you feel Mom."
Garret amazes us with his desire to learn. We were playing the "guess who" game of the Bible, and it was going back and forth between Dad and Mom, because we know each other good enough by now, we can guess quickly. Finally he got the answer so it was his turn. He thought of some guy in the Bible I hadn't even heard of (though I know I had because I've read Kings before). We spent so long trying to guess who it was, until we finally gave up - It turned out to be some rotten king who started with a M, and was a son of Hezekiah. He knew all the facts about him, and his eyes get all big as he fills us in. He loves playing games, and if he loses, he will lay in bed and figure out how he could have won. (the next morning, if he can wait that long, he explains it all!) He loves to read, but when he catches your ear, he jabbers and jabbers - he's that kid that you block out and just end up giving grunt answers to. ;)
I am really proud of Serena. She has done amazing for coming to America and fitting into a family - with it's oddities, personalities and difficulties, and loves us. She has learned so much - a lot about manners, obedience, being helpful and responsible - besides having to learn the English language and beginning school. She is the most responsible kid in our family. She is the best helper. I'm constantly torn between letting her do the job, or getting a half hearted job done by one of her siblings. The kids earn bead for doing jobs, and can trade beads for either TV/computer time, or $. She loves the TV, but since I started this, she saves for $ and puts it in the bank. The other day, I forked over $17 to her, and I was thinking, "what?" The other kids get piddly amounts, unless they have something in mind to buy, than they work and save. I'm impressed with many things about Serena - but tend to keep most of my feelings inside (she might get a big head? I really don't know why.) When I do express to her how happy I am with her, she is very pleased. She is a very confident girl and hasn't had a moment of regret of coming to America. Her only sorrow that I know of, is something so seemingly small, yet makes her so sad. She is sad that we don't have any pictures of her when she was a baby. She has studied the other kid's pictures and family pictures of us before she came to us. She has asked me to cut a picture out of her and Gabe and tape it in the old family photo. Ahhh?! She has her annoying traits as do all, but we were very thankful to have her in our family.
Damien is starting to stink - literally. I hadn't noticed it before - but the B.O. is happening. The teen years are right around the corner, and I need to stock up on deodrant. He is his own person and has established his place in the family as "ruler" among the kids. He organizes ball games, playing school, games, what snack they are going to have, and controls as much as he wants. (Serena has butted heads big time with him on this, but has backed down to give him back his honored place.) He can be the most helpful kid who is patient and great at teaching - if he wants. He's great at getting the kids excited about doing what he wants them to do. He is looked up to by the kids on our block too. He can be lazy and selfous, and very slow to think of others before himself. But the tender side comes out and warms his dad and mom's heart. Something I think is unique to Damien is his love for babies - he's always been that way - from being a 2 year old when Garret came along, to an 11 yr. old, when he held "minutes old" Zeke, he has eyes only for them - taking it all in - being affectionate and protective. He still also likes to hug and kiss his parents and I think his dad is still his hero - at this point.
This is how it is at the Symington house - fall 2009.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Our indecision
Is using birth control what God means for us?
What a personal, embarrassing, uncomfortable, and controversial topic. And one that keeps me up at night – or keeps me on my own side of the bed at night…;) A topic with many personal opinions, yet no answers that give me peace – or answers that I been able to claim as my own and feel good about.
Why? I’m constantly tossed and turned with believing what the culture (or even some Christian friends whom I hold high esteem for.) is telling us, and the possibility that God doesn’t think the same thing.
Here are some thoughts from an article I stumbled on by Val Halloran:
In the Old Testament it says “It is I who open and close the womb.” Does He, or doesn’t He? I think many of us believe that once we have proved ourselves to be fertile, that the number of children we have escapes God’s control. If Romans 12:1 calls us to “present our bodies as a living sacrifice”, does this exclude the surrender of our wombs, the very thing that distinguishes us as women from men?
This world teaches that we should trust our own judgment when anticipating the future and what we think we can handle, but Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us not to “lean on our own understanding, but to trust in the Lord with all our hearts.”
I doubt if Mary, the mother of Jesus, would have chosen to become pregnant in her situation, but she said, “Be it done to me according to Thy will.” Her pregnancy was not convenient or timely in human terms, but God had a plan far greater than she could understand.
Psalm 127 says “Children are gifts from the Lord”. Has His Word ceased to be true in this modern age? Are we going to believe the culture around us or His eternal, unchangeable Word?
I don’t believe, as many churches teach, that it is irresponsible to allow God to have control over our wombs even when we face financial or other temporal pressures. God says He will not give us more than we can handle (I Corinthians 10:13).
The very children we accept from Him could someday be the key to alleviate some of those pressures we feel. It used to be that children were considered a financial asset, rather than a liability. But now that so many children are indulged, rather than taught to work and honor their parents with their finances, we consider children a liability because we want to give them all the gadgets the world has to offer.
Wow! That gave me a LOT to think about.
I’m wondering what is meant when Christians say, “we have to be responsible when we decide whether we’ll have more children or not.” What is responsible? Are we to make sure there is enough $ for a good college education, etc.? And enough extra $ and time for our own vacations, etc. (which truthfully, I find myself pining for at times – but is it really fulfilling to keep "doing" for ourselves, or does God mean for us to?) Is it assumed that if we have “too many” kids, we won’t be able to give them the individual time that each one deserves? (Which is funny in a way, because you can have 1 kid and not give him enough time too.)
And this is what I’m pondering – it may seem daring to suppose, but what if we took the Psalm that says: “Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate.”
– can we hope by that, God will use our children to go out in different directions serving Him in ways that we haven’t been able to? Can we hope that as we pray for them and seek to raise them in a Godly home, they will become soldiers for Jesus Christ, and by having children, we are building God's army?
What happened in our thinking through the years that makes us think of children being a burden?
If we were to have “control” over this area of our life, I wonder why there seems to be no easy option. So many couples freely share the news that they’ve gone under the knife. Yet a close friend of mine confided to me that “her husband doesn’t feel as good now that he’s had the surgery”. I’ve read that the same is true for some women who’ve had surgery. Hmmm.
There was a point in our lives where we weren’t allowed to use contraceptives because of the religious group we were in. We are no longer part of that group, and “free” to make a decision, but the weird thing is now that we can, there seems to be more questions than answers.
For anyone who knows us (and the chaotic moments at our house) and is squirming, (wondering why it’s even a question in my mind after we already have 6 kids), I apologize for bringing you any discomfort. My desire is to live with no regrets. We’ve prayed about it for a long while, and haven’t been satisfied yet. Does anyone have any wisdom or input to share?
What a personal, embarrassing, uncomfortable, and controversial topic. And one that keeps me up at night – or keeps me on my own side of the bed at night…;) A topic with many personal opinions, yet no answers that give me peace – or answers that I been able to claim as my own and feel good about.
Why? I’m constantly tossed and turned with believing what the culture (or even some Christian friends whom I hold high esteem for.) is telling us, and the possibility that God doesn’t think the same thing.
Here are some thoughts from an article I stumbled on by Val Halloran:
In the Old Testament it says “It is I who open and close the womb.” Does He, or doesn’t He? I think many of us believe that once we have proved ourselves to be fertile, that the number of children we have escapes God’s control. If Romans 12:1 calls us to “present our bodies as a living sacrifice”, does this exclude the surrender of our wombs, the very thing that distinguishes us as women from men?
This world teaches that we should trust our own judgment when anticipating the future and what we think we can handle, but Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us not to “lean on our own understanding, but to trust in the Lord with all our hearts.”
I doubt if Mary, the mother of Jesus, would have chosen to become pregnant in her situation, but she said, “Be it done to me according to Thy will.” Her pregnancy was not convenient or timely in human terms, but God had a plan far greater than she could understand.
Psalm 127 says “Children are gifts from the Lord”. Has His Word ceased to be true in this modern age? Are we going to believe the culture around us or His eternal, unchangeable Word?
I don’t believe, as many churches teach, that it is irresponsible to allow God to have control over our wombs even when we face financial or other temporal pressures. God says He will not give us more than we can handle (I Corinthians 10:13).
The very children we accept from Him could someday be the key to alleviate some of those pressures we feel. It used to be that children were considered a financial asset, rather than a liability. But now that so many children are indulged, rather than taught to work and honor their parents with their finances, we consider children a liability because we want to give them all the gadgets the world has to offer.
Wow! That gave me a LOT to think about.
I’m wondering what is meant when Christians say, “we have to be responsible when we decide whether we’ll have more children or not.” What is responsible? Are we to make sure there is enough $ for a good college education, etc.? And enough extra $ and time for our own vacations, etc. (which truthfully, I find myself pining for at times – but is it really fulfilling to keep "doing" for ourselves, or does God mean for us to?) Is it assumed that if we have “too many” kids, we won’t be able to give them the individual time that each one deserves? (Which is funny in a way, because you can have 1 kid and not give him enough time too.)
And this is what I’m pondering – it may seem daring to suppose, but what if we took the Psalm that says: “Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them. They will not be put to shame when they contend with their enemies in the gate.”
– can we hope by that, God will use our children to go out in different directions serving Him in ways that we haven’t been able to? Can we hope that as we pray for them and seek to raise them in a Godly home, they will become soldiers for Jesus Christ, and by having children, we are building God's army?
What happened in our thinking through the years that makes us think of children being a burden?
If we were to have “control” over this area of our life, I wonder why there seems to be no easy option. So many couples freely share the news that they’ve gone under the knife. Yet a close friend of mine confided to me that “her husband doesn’t feel as good now that he’s had the surgery”. I’ve read that the same is true for some women who’ve had surgery. Hmmm.
There was a point in our lives where we weren’t allowed to use contraceptives because of the religious group we were in. We are no longer part of that group, and “free” to make a decision, but the weird thing is now that we can, there seems to be more questions than answers.
For anyone who knows us (and the chaotic moments at our house) and is squirming, (wondering why it’s even a question in my mind after we already have 6 kids), I apologize for bringing you any discomfort. My desire is to live with no regrets. We’ve prayed about it for a long while, and haven’t been satisfied yet. Does anyone have any wisdom or input to share?
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